It's time to go... The Travel Beard

An ode to my traveling beard

You made many laugh

You made many leer

You made young Asian children cry in fear

You caught food for Kate

You horrified the masses

You have have no respect, they can all kiss their own asses

You buckled women's knees

You drew handshakes in pubs

You were nearly called up to be Zach Galifianakis sub

You excited many a barber

You disappointed them all

"head only mate" was the call

You have been photographed for blogs

You have been caressed in the garden

You have have heard them all from Santa Claus to Jesus and even Bin Larden

You have blocked the sun

You have warmed a cool breeze

You have more likes on Facebook than the unbeard Bean

You have been combed and plaited

You have been washed and shampooed

You have drunk White Russians like that guy, The Dude

You have been twirled in my fingers

You have been found in my teeth

You have caught many things, even bird-poo to my disbelief

You have the texture of wire

You have the look of an old blue dog

You are the new mans best friend, with the strength to saw logs

That all being said, its time for a change

I want my neck back, thats not that strange

Hoo roo old mate, and thanks for the memories

What I'll miss most, is the smell of wild celery