Ben Clifford

Ben is 23 years old…..

Ben has a little girl, Alizay she is 4 years old and the light of his life.

He’s just like any dad and wants the best for his little girl.

He has been working for the last year or so doing the interiors of campervans and boats.

Over the Christmas period Ben was taking some well-deserved time off and having some fun.

He was mucking around with a few friends in a swimming pool when in a moment his life changed.

Ben dived too deep into the pool.

He remembers hitting the bottom and a blow to the head.

He then remembers trying to surface from the water but not being able to move.

When I talked to him about that six weeks later I said “Ben that must have been horrible. What did you do?”

He give me a smile and said “as soon as I realised I couldn’t move I held my breath”

“My friend was in the pool me and I knew he would help me”

Ben has always been a fighter and an optimist.

His friend did save Ben that day and an ambulance was called.

Ben had broken his neck and suddenly everyone’s world had changed.

He spent the next forty five days in and intensive care ward.

Once Ben was admitted and stabilised the doctors wanted a meeting with Family

We thought they would talk about Ben not being able to walk again or about his arms and hands that he couldn’t move.

The doctor surprised us.

He didn’t mention any of that.

He just said we need to focus on his breathing.

Breathing? We said. It had not even occurred to us that this could be a problem.

That was his first major challenge ….just breathing.

He had a breathing tube in his mouth for the first week.

This meant of cause he could not talk.

We all stayed by his side as much as we could and his ICU room was always busy.

We were telling him everything would be ok and we were looking forward to the following week when the tube was coming out of his mouth and going straight into his throat.

We were all telling him we were so looking forward to him being able to talk.

Ben was the most excited out of all of us.

The was so much he wanted to say and when this tube came out of his mouth it would be great.

Ben did not want his little girl to see him like that without being able to comfort her with words at least.

This wasn’t to be, as we all discovered to our horror that when the tube got changed from his mouth to his throat he still could not talk.

It turned out to be forty days later before he said a word.

We ended up bringing Alizay up after a couple of weeks.

She was staying with Ben’s Mum (Kelly) and wanted to know where her dad was.

Ben’s Mum showed her some photos of her dad and tried to prepare her for what she was about to see but it didn’t go well.

The first time she saw her dad she was scared of him.

He couldn’t say a word and he couldn’t move a limb and this broke his heart.

Fortunately the second visit went better.

Alizay visits all the time now and loves seeing her Dad.

After the ICU ward Ben spent a few days in the high dependency ward then moved on to Ward 11.

He was there for a couple of weeks and they started getting him in a wheelchair more often.

The next move was to the Otara spinal unit where he was to start his long road to recovery.

Bens mum was there every day from the day of the accident and soon became a regular face at the spinal unit.

Ben was getting in the chair every day and when Alizay came in with Bens Mum she would push Ben around tirelessly.

I was out in the garden with them one day and Alizay was insistent the she wanted to push Bens chair around (with no help from me). The place is full of raised gardens so I followed as close as I could and grabbed the handle every time I saw Ben on a collision cause with a garden.

I thought this would last for 5-10 minutes but 20 minutes later Alizay was still going strong and I was tired. She’s a lot like her Dad when it comes to stamina. She just keeps going.

Alizay loved helping her Dad and getting things that he needed for him and they became a real little team.

Things were going well and Ben had settled in. He was doing physiotherapy and OT. He was in his chair every day and even went out on one occasion to check out the local shops.

Then one day Ben started complaining about a pain in his neck. It had been around for a while he said but it wasn’t getting any better. In fact it was getting worse.

They bought in an x-ray machine and found that a disk had slipped in Ben’s neck.

Now two months after his accident he was heading back to Hospital for another operation.

Ben took it in his stride and told me “this needs to be done and better now than later”

He was there for a couple of weeks and he had a steel rod extended right down his back.

He was in ICU again and then moved back to ward 11.

Ben was in a lot of pain before and after the operation but he is coming right now.

He is now back in Otara Spinal unit and is back working on his recovery.

Bens Mum and Nina are looking after Alizay at the moment.

Unfortunately they were given notice on their unit a few weeks ago (the landlord is selling the place) and they are currently trying to find a place in the Hibiscus Coast or surrounding areas that is suitable for all of them and Ben.

The spinal unit had originally set his exit date to be the 5th May. I am sure this will be extended due to Ben’s recent operation but it still worries him.

Ben is looking forward to being there as his little girl grows up and playing an active part in her daily life.

After all he has been through his life, she is the light of his life.

I am sure Ben would feel a lot better if he knew where he was going to live when he gets out.

That is Ben’s story so far.

Initially Ben did not want to share his story as he felt it was a very private journey but over time he has come to see that to share this story is one of the best things he can do for the future of him and his daughter.

You’re help with information about suitable accommodation or a donation for setting up his future life with Alizay could help give this story the happy ending it deserves.

Thank you for taking the time to read this

Bens Dad

At this stage we don’t know what form of help may be needed but any financial assistance will certainly be appreciated to give him that bit extra to get what he and his daughter need e.g. extra physio, extra aids/help to daily living.