So this year I have been battling with many health issues. I refuse to let it get in the way of my work too much but man it makes every shift so difficult.
At the moment I am battling sinus issues which cause sleep apnea meaning I'm lucky if i get 4 hours sleep a night. This does not help my ongoing battle with fatigue at all. I am also battling with arthritis in my hands and knees. I have loss of strength in my right hand and arm and recently the vision in my right eye has went blurry.
One of the most difficult symptoms to deal with and talk about is my difficulty going to the bathroom. I have to take medication to do this basic task. This symptom truly makes me full utterly useless. I cant even do a basic bodily function and I am only 27 years old.
What makes all of this worse is the failure of the health system to provide me basic care. Every department palms me off to another and it is a constant battle between the other departments blaming my MS and my neurology team saying it is not the MS. I have now decided to only go to appointments that are necessary such as my infusion and drug review.
I am currently at breaking point. I don't know what to do anymore. The saddest thing is I have begun to look into legal euthanasia. I cannot imagine going through all of this for another 50 plus years.
I am torn between making a decision to enjoy a really good few years and end in a good place. The alternative seems to be suffer for 50 plus years.
At the moment with covid my fundraising has stalled and I am really doubting I will be able to meet this goal and get the treatment.
This is really difficult for me to open up like this but I want to be real with you all. Every single moment of my life is a battle either extreme pain, cramps/spasms, vision problems, breathing problems, loss of feeling/ strength, unbearable fatigue and extreme depression.
Hopefully sharing helps. Thank you all for your support it really is appreciated.
This side of MS isn't shown often and I'm glad I can finally begin to make people understand what it's like to have a silent and slowly debilitating illness.
Please help donate and share thankyou 💜