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Tove needs help

  • Update from Tove

      12 January 2022

    So I finally got my next surgery date. Friday 21st January. They've warned me it'll be a pretty big one, that I'll be in a LOT of pain, and that I HAVE to stay in hospital about a week. My surgeon was like, I know you hate hospital, I know you tend to discharge early because you think you'll be fine, but you have to promise not to do that this time... not that I think you'll be in any state too, you still have to promise not to leave until I personally discharge you. Joy.

    Its been a really rough few months, the pain has increased to the point I barely sleep or eat. I've also had massive problems with my GP, as my incredible dr has gone on study leave and so I've been dealing with a bunch of different, highly judgmental new doctors who refuse to read my history, my notes, listen to me. I've been having to go in several times a week, explaining things over and over, and getting charged for every mistake they make. It's been hell, and I'm really struggling. I'm in huge debt and I'm also struggling to support the many people who rely on me. The community work I do is what keeps me sane, helping those in shit situations is so important to me and I hate that I can't do that as much as I need too.

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  • Update as of 23/03/2021

      23 March 2021

    So I'm out of hospital.

    Surgery went... not great.

    Couldn't do most of what was needed, again, too much other damage to heal.

    So hopefully next time we'll be able to do more (she says every time with decreasing hope).

    Also managed to pop a(internal) stitch 2 days post op, and there's nothing we can do but bleed like a motherf-er, deal with the extra pain and then deal with the inevitable complication from it next surgery...hopefully ACTUALLY in 2 months, not another covid/dhb booking system f around 3 and half months...

    Sorry. I'm a bit disheartened, despite some progress being made in one area, its definitely going backwards in others.

    It makes me especially angry because its unlikely to have gone so badly if the booking hadn't got f-ed and I got the surgery when I was supposed too, but no point bitching and fretting about it.

    It's the DHB, they suck and I'm lucky I have the medical team I have, who are (mostly) on my side (yeah, looking at you house officer who refused to give me the prescribed medication as laid down by my surgical team, the pain team, and ya know, what has been given EVERY OTHER SURGERY...) (sorry, was really out of line of him, and a formal complaint has been laid by my team's, but doesn't really help with the extra pain while waiting to see a gp.), it's just depressing to know that I'm getting pretty good care... and it's all still just such a f around.

    I shouldn't bitch. I'm okay. In so much pain its actually kinda impressive, so bed rest is the name of the game.

    Oh, and thank you to all you who've been supporting me, in so many ways. It's been so beautiful, and I'm so grateful. I'll be fine, sorry to be a negative bitch. xxxx

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  • Update directly from Tove

      12 March 2021

    UPDATE

    Woop, finally surgery next Friday the 19th. Only 2 months late... apparently I was booked but covid unbooked me and forgot to let anyone know, and my surgeon, god love him, is awee bit daffy and just forgot until I got sent to the hospital on Wednesday.

    Also... So because its been so long since the last surgery.. things have got REALLY bad.. like emergency department actually tried to get me sent for surgery that night, but because I'm so high risk, and my surgeon wasn't in(he's head of surgery, so he don't work nights, but it's how hes managed to keep me as a patient and do the surgery every 2 months, because he told the people who wanted me discharged from surgery to F right off)...they just ... they didn't wanna risk it. I also got warned today it'll likely be a pretty rough surgery... they don't tend to do that, so that's fun ... it's also playing merry hell with my f-ing anxiety... argh sorry, pity part needs to stop. Love y'all xx

    Also, I'm so so f-ing grateful to all the wonderful people around the world who've donated and shared this GiveaLittle campaign. Every donation sends me into happy tears, and gives me both a sense of hope... and a feeling that perhaps I'm not a disgusting, unworthy peice of shit (that doesn't last long, but it's really f-ing nice whilst it lasts). So yeah. Thank you more than I could ever say.

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    • 15/03/2021 by Krystine Crutcher

      All the best Tove. I wish you a speedy recovery. Our thoughts are with you. 🤗