Happy Birthday Bernard - Baby Loss NZ

Could you imagine life without your special wee people around? Or not knowing who you kids could have been? Not being allowed to go home with this precious wee bundle you’ve carried.

If you were in this situation where you had to say goodbye to your baby having support & beautiful tangible memories become a huge part of your healing process.

Last year dear friends of ours lost a beautiful little angel Bernard. Bernard was born sleeping at 24 weeks after being diagnosed with a fatal fetal condition causing multiple severe medical abnormalities.

He was born on the 4th of May an absolutely beautiful little man.

In moments like these when you have incredibly limited time & extreme grief it is so hard to process but even harder to let go. This is where Baby Loss NZ have become a fundamental part of that healing process. I still love seeing Bernard’s beautiful gold hands and feet on display in the lounge.

The wonderful Sarah created the charity after suffering her own losses and realising how little support there is for families during this time. What she does is simply unreal!

Baby Loss NZ is the only support for Middlemore Hospital giving their services at all hours of the day & night for free to all babies from just 8 weeks gestation to 8 years old. They also provide that support to the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU) at Starship Hospital.

100% of all funds go into creating memories for families, her time & her one other helper Josie’s time is not paid at all.

The cost to put together and gift beautiful memory keepsakes & a Care Box is on average $397 per person. Some of this includes:

Photos during labour &/or after birth so you have as many memories as you wish.

Casting of your babies hands and feet. These can be framed or mounted & are in a beautiful gold (still can’t believe they can do this as young as 8 weeks gestation, incredible!).

Name plaque with special details.

Ink-less hand/footprint kit which the team can do for you/with you if you wish.

Wild flower seeds to be planted.

Footprint candle.

‘In Loving Memory Of ‘ card

2 teddy bears, one to stay with your baby and one to stay with you.

‘Special Memories’ booklet. Also a journal if you know ahead of time that your baby may not make it.

Certificate of life

Memory box

Butterfly

Angel Key ring

Footprint ribbon pin

Angel charm

Bookmark.

They will even help you dress your wee bundle & arrange a beautiful bassinet.

All of this at no cost to the family. Even more options are available during pregnancy but more importantly, it’s the support that is there to talk through anything you are struggling with & gut wrenching decisions you may have to make.

When Baby Loss NZ are helping over 200 families a year and you think there’s only 365 days in a year ... that’s a big ask for 2 people who give their time relentlessly.

They need help to keep helping others.

I’m so fortunate to have my little girl. Before Xmas and just before her first birthday we found out I had early onset cervical cancer. I was one of the lucky ones, they removed a large part of me & I will be absolutely fine, no nasty treatments, but I can no longer carry a baby. If we ever fall pregnant unintentionally there’s a very real possibility we will need Baby Loss NZ. Imagine how you would feel if you didn’t go home with your precious wee baby.

On the 4th of May this year I will run the Rotorua Marathon for Bernard’s Birthday. Just because he can’t be here in person doesn’t mean he isn’t deeply loved and remembered.

I have never run a full marathon, haven’t run in 2 years, have wobbly bits from not quite bouncing back from my now 1 year old, working full time, lucky to be a hands on mum & then international travel in the mix. Making time is hard. Still ... I get up early, put the little human in her stroller, put one foot in front of the other, curse myself A LOT & then realise I’m very lucky and do it again.

If I can celebrate Bernard’s Birthday & memory by raising some money for the people who helped Bernard’s Mum & Dad & so many others that would be a wonderful.

I’m not sure how I will make that finish line but I know there will be a beautiful wee angel helping Aunty Tash (my motivation) & of course you! The goal is $3k which when you consider the above is not even 10 babies, I hope we can get there.

It would be a beautiful birthday gift, to help Baby Loss NZ continue to gift what they do for babies/families in need.

We can all make the finish line & keep the memories going.

Lots of love little man.

P.S - any extra good vibes you can send down to Aunty Tash and Dad while running would be much appreciated ❤️❤️ It won’t be pretty but we will get there.