Please help us get back on our feet
Ben's daddy left and things have been really hard for Ben and I trying to get back on our feet. Could you please help us along?
Auckland
Ben's daddy left at the beginning of March - we had been trying to live separately in the same house after splitting up a long time ago so we could raise Ben together and share household related costs, but it was just not working out - and things have been really hard for both of us.
We're both trying to manage on our own, and Ben is trying so very hard to be the 'man of the house' now - buoying my spirits when I am down, giving me lots of hugs and kisses, and helping out around the house. The only thing he can't do is help out with the finances (though he did give me his $2 change from his school lunch, bless him).
Sadly I am unable to work outside the home because of three serious health issues: a heart problem and a blood disorder (polycythemia) which both cause severe breathing difficulties on minimal exertion, and recently diagnosed sleep apnoea. I am virtually housebound because I don't drive, and can't even get grocery shopping by myself as I can't manage to walk from the bus stop carrying groceries by myself. Fortunately I have been able to get lifts to date, or someone else does my grocery shopping for me.
I have NO family in New Zealand apart from my children. My next nearest relative is in the UK, so I can't turn to them for help or support.
I am now having to try and find all rent, bills and food money by myself with little income. I have had to cut down or out on many things we used to take for granted to save money, but the thing that is holding us back from having enough money to live on are two finance agreements I had which are set to run for the next nine months. One is costing $120 a month and the other is $90 a month.
If we can manage to pay both of these off then it will mean we will free up more money each month for essentials like the rent, bills, food, and maybe even a few little treats for Ben from time to time.
If you can help us, even by donating $1, we would be so very grateful. If you can't, we understand - it's tough out there for so many people. A share of this page or a few kind words means so much too.
Thank you in advance for ANY help you may be able to offer, and thank you to all of you who have been sending us supportive messages, texts, phoning us to check we are ok, and popping round too. It is only through this love and support we've realised that we WILL be able to manage on our own... because with all of you walking along beside us in spirit it gives us strength.
If you do not have a credit card to make a donation, but would like to help, you can also donate, if you know me via Facebook, please PM me and I will give you the email address to use. Thank you :)
Thank you everyone for reading. Much love to you all.
Latest update
Thank you for your continued support on all levels 26 March 2015
I am sorry that I have not updated for a little while, but Ben has been having a few emotional issues lately - totally understandable - but it has put added worries on me because obviously I hate seeing him suffering. I have kept in close contact with his school, and we now both have a Social Workers in Schools lady that is involved with Ben and I to try to assist us, and now he has someone else to talk to about things that are concerning him, and who can make sure that the school are aware of how he's feeling too so that he gets the appropriate support at school and is treated with understanding and compassion. Ben is a proud boy - just like his mummy - and often doesn't seek help when he should, so I am glad that the social worker is helping him to open up to her and teaching him different coping strategies. It's a lot for Ben to deal with having his daddy leave home, and even more so when his now sole caregiver (me) has health issues - he has taken it upon himself to take on MY burdens - even though I try to keep them away from him as much as possible, but being the astute child he is, there's not much pulling the wool over his eyes. Things WILL get better, I know they will - for both of us, and we WILL grow from this experience. We are both determined not to go under, and your love and support has made this journey a lot more easier for us. Thank you so much. Love Beccy and Ben xox
Latest donations
Dear Asher, thank you so much for your lovely comments and your very generous donation. With all the love and support we have through Ben's Supporters it helps us to know that we are not alone, and the kind donors on this fundraiser have certainly helped to make our life just that little bit easier. I do hope we meet in person some day xox
Thank you SO much for donating to help Ben and I out. It is very much appreciated. xox
Thank you to whoever made this donation to us. Ben and I really appreciate it. Sadly there is no email address showing, and no name, so we don't know who you are and can't thank you personally. But, thank you :)
Thank you so much, Marilyn, for your very generous donation to Ben and I. We really do appreciate it. :) xox
Dear Leslie and Doreen, thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart, for your kind and generous donation. It means so much to Ben and I. Ben really IS a super lad, and he (and Thomas, Jordan and Simeon) have given me the strength to carry on when otherwise I might have been tempted to give up. I miss you both, and the other members of the BFHS. Please send them all my love. We are still at the same address. xox
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